click this if ur hot Milk's Favorite Cookie™

my 2015 new years resolution is going to be to tally every time i jerk off because i need to know this information

iwishlilbwasmygrandpa:

Like if youre horny and want to destroy america

(Source: flip5600, via moistpits)

primordialsandstonedevice:

aliens looking at the earth from space: what a piece of shit. lets bounce

(via lucifurby)

smash-turbation:

Imagine watching an episode of Catfish and seeing someone use your pictures to catfish someone else

(Source: pornhubhemmo, via rhydonmyhardon)

spirited away is about rescuing your idiot parents from pig hell, a trial we must all face while growing up

(Source: pyramidslayer, via dialupmodem)

Aug 21st 2014 / 09:36 / 39,852 notes

giliananderson:

double major in overthinking and worry, minor in night crying 

(via childpuncher)

welcome to my twisted ass

(Source: slimydad, via lucifurby)

just my little onion here

mickeyriku:

*holding a very tiny onion* just my little onion i am holding

(via lucifurby)

  • nun: pastor, we are having trouble with the exorcism
  • pastor: have you tried unblessing and blessing again ?